My boyfriend went to a strip club last night and didn’t tell me/ask me if I was okay with it. Am I in the right to be upset? I’m more upset that he didn’t tell me. Not that he went to one

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That’s a bit odd to me. I would definitely be upset if he didn’t tell me- then it feels like he’s hiding something. How did it come up?

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Oh, yeah I’d be upset for sure! Second hand info is not ok for me...

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Yes.

Just like you I think it’s ok to go to strip clubs, but it sounds like he isn’t being fair. If you’ve talked about this and he said he isn’t comfortable with you going without him, then he shouldn’t do it without you or at least a heads up first.

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Be vocal that he disrespected you by lying/omitting the truth and for the double standard and that you will not tolerate that again. You can tell him you’d like to know what happened at the strip club and directly ask if he cheated on you (only if you’re comfortable having that discussion, facts are if one chooses to, one can get more than a lap dance at a strip club, depending on location)

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Yes. I have this issue with my husband. The lack of communication or simple heads up prior to making decisions should be a no brainer

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Yeah the fact that you found out from someone else is a no go for me.

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I feel like this could be resolved in a conversation.
Definitely sit down and ask why’d he go/didn’t mention it/etc.
It sounds like they just ended up there, not that it was done maliciously. Sometimes guys don’t think it’s something to mention. They’re dumb 🤷🏽‍♀️
I wouldn’t question it beyond that. Maybe suggest you plan a night to go back together ☺️

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Was it pre planned or drunken last minute decision? Was it his idea? I don’t think it’s a big deal if it was last minute and not his idea. Just let him live.

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@M1 people that like to have fun lol

Yah I would be upset

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We’ve talked about strip clubs and he’s told me that he wouldn’t be comfortable with me going to one without him. I’ve respected that and never gone to one after we made our relationship official. We’ve been dating a year

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It’s absolutely fair for you to be upset especially because he didn’t tell you about it but it came up through another person. Would he have told you if the other person didn’t tell you? Are you comfortable knowing that there may be other things that he may not have revealed or do you still trust him? A pack in a relationship is very important. Think about if you still trust him or not. If you still trust him , have a chat about how you are hurt and make him realize he did a mistake.

Any chance that the friend made it up to push your buttons? If he didn’t, that’s bad of your boyfriend to not tell you first, bad form to hide. I’d be upset too (about the hiding and double standards) and tell him that much.

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